Welcome! Ü
Saturday, February 27, 2010
|10:53 PM|
I don't want to do the tattoo anymore. It is not beautiful anymore. It is damn ugly. Damn ugly. If I do the tattoo, it is like adding salt to my wound. May have to wait until I am totally over it or I shall never do tattoos..
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
|10:48 PM|
I don't know how to live my life now. My life was used to revolve around her but now she's gone, I don't know what to do. I have been crying myself to sleep every night and in the day I am not in a good mood. I just feel like crying forever. I know this is not the way since there is 0% that she is coming back to me. I feel like running away from everybody. Like live in the US then come back again maybe when am going to retire or something. HOW? I keep thinking about doing silly things but I got no guts. Life is so meaningless.
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
Friday, February 26, 2010
|1:43 AM|
I have a very strong feeling to have a tattoo on me after watching Miami Ink on Discovery Travel & Living channel. I have always wanted her kiss on me as my 1st tattoo. But what I am afraid of is the pain, cost of having a tattoo, which studio to go to (I want my tattoo to be near perfect) and how to hide from my family. I have this image in mind..
By that time, I want her to go with me and have this tattoo done. Hope she will be willing to.. Waiting till then.
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
Thursday, February 25, 2010
|12:10 AM|
It's over.
Come to think of it, it was quite a pleasant ending comparing to others?
It was sweet
It's only my second time in a relationship but I do feel more 'in' this relationship
Is it because she's a she?
She says I am very childish and she just entertained me when I say something childish
I admit I am childish at times but I am afterall only 18 years old.
In this relationship, I think I really put myself in her shoes very often
Sometimes I just feel so blissed that I am able to do that and I reward myself for that.
At other times, I just feel so unfair.
But after putting myself in her shoes, it just cover those angry thoughts
Is this love?
包容.. Is that it?
Well, anyway, it's over.
She will still be my soulmate, I guess?
It will always be a sweet and unforgettable memory.
To her,
Thanks for the time that we were together
Thanks for being so sweet and sometimes behaving like a child when I 'sayang' you.
Ur kisses, hugz and many other actions make me feel so loved and those are the things that really made me feel rejuvenated even though I am really tired.
Lastly,
Thanks for being you.
Honest, straightforward, lovely, cute, handgun, gentle, caring, fierce, many more..
Love you.
Will be by your side like a leech. You'll never shake me off! HAHAHAHA!!
Take care sweetie.. *hugz and kisses*
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
|2:45 PM|
I did something stupid just now. I don't feel anything at all. Actually I roughly know what is going to happen and I thought of rejecting it but I did not. I was manipulated. I am supposed to feel regretful and hateful but at this moment, I do not feel a thing. I'm just back to the normal 'sian' me. Now downloading ABM file so can play audition. Just hope I stop doing stupid things anymore.
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
|12:43 AM|
I went to watch Valentines Day ALONE @ GV Yishun. Everyone there was in twos or even in threes. In front of my seat is a young family of three. So envious. Apparently I was lonely in that theatre. Initially, I felt that it was meaningless to watch a movie like that alone, but actually I was fine with it after a while and when I was looking at the scene that features Julia Roberts, Anne Hathaay and many pretty and handsome actors. ANG MOH lehs! Ha ha! I do not have to please anybody and I just watched it. Simple. With just a small Ice Lemon Tea. It was great as there weren't many people in the theatre. It just feels a bit sour as I see couples walking into the theatre.
There was a period of time when the film had a bit of problem. The words spoken cannot be heard properly and there were these "Zzz Zz Zz" noises from the background sounds. I was kinda pissed but then again, there wasn't anyone watching with me so I just forget it and watch my show. If she was beside me, she will be bored to death as the film wasn't a cartoon and she will be complaining about the sound system. Well, it was just peace for me. Don't know if it is a good thing or not. 48 hours ago, I sent her a message saying "I dun wanna tok 2 u. Go do ur ting." It may sound unreasonable to her. But after last wednesday, I was like.. "I've had enough" So, I just smsed her like that. More than 48hours later, no sms were sent out to her and none were sent to me from her. I am not gonna sms her 1st. I think I hve done enough. Come to think of it, she also had her sacrifices but I.. I don't know la.. WHAT IS THIS?! I REALLY DON'T KNOW! I only know that I am always in bed sleeping, trying to avoid the matter. Trying to avoid contact with anybody. I don't know what to do.. WHAT SHOULD I DO?!
Lonely & in a dilemma
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
Saturday, February 06, 2010
|3:44 PM|
Today d 1st UT, season 3 - Financial Accounting is over!
YES! 1 DOWN! 4MORE TO GO!
But 2day damn difficult la. OMG!
While doing, I was thinking ''I dun wanna repeat yr 4!''
I do until cmi liao den I juz do for d sake of doing.. Do a bit, skip, skip & skip..
I dun expect much but reali reali hope I can pass d whole module.. So I dun needa repeat in yr4. Haiz..
Shall take a break den continue studying 4 Entrepreneur ltr.. MAYBE ONLI LA!! ^^
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
Monday, February 01, 2010
|8:45 AM|
Oh ya.. My GPA for UT2 is 3.. Haiz. 4 B+, 1 D. Fuck. If I nv get D & dunno dat I cannot fail any subj, I will not study.. Esp in tiz kinda mood. Ya. Juz hope I dun 'fire' at anyone 2day.. Dat person sure damn suay..
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
|8:40 AM|
I am so not in the mood all thanks to ytd.. Had a tiff.. Kinda.. I wasn't happy the whole day and when I get home, the fucking internet is nt working. Damn it. I looked at all the movies I have in my lappy and watched The Spartans but I dunno is too lame or wad.. But Im not laughing. Juz watching.. I can't slp well ytd and now, the next day in math lesson, Im oso not in a good mood. Fuck. Really no mood to do anything. I dun wan myself to be affected this much, but ya, I am affected. ARRGGH!! Feel lik pon-ing until I hav the mood. I oso dunno how to get back my mood. Juz feel so fucked.. Haiz.
[S]he [w]inks**
+ + +
November 2006
